Friday, July 1, 2011

The Job Search

Having spent the entirety of the last two months applying and being rejected from a multitude of potential jobs, I have found the only way to cope with this life-crushing reality is to appreciate the absurdity of job qualification listings. Here are a few examples with more to follow:

- Apple Inventory Specialist: Reinventing the art of shipping and receiving
- Internal Plant Maintenance: This was described as basically being a gardener for indoor plants. It's like calling lawn mowing: External Flora Removal Specialist.
- Environmental Services Technician: aka Janitor. And this was their tagline:
I don't just vacuum, dust and sanitize; I'm leading the attack on germs.

I don't just make things look and smell good; I make sure no one else gets sick.

The True Heroes